I am in a same sex relationship and after 2 years of talking about having children, we eventually embarked on treatment through a private clinic. I have polycystic ovarian syndrome (a condition where small cysts on the ovary cause hormonal imbalances, which can result in infertility), irregular periods and don’t ovulate. I was on several different fertility drugs and after 7 unsuccessful attempts at artificial insemination, we decided IVF would be the next step.
There was absolutely no chance I would have fewer than 2 embryos put back as I wanted as much of a chance of getting pregnant as possible, even though I was told there was 1 in 3 chance of getting pregnant with twins if it was successful. To have twins would have been a dream come true so this didn’t worry us at all.
I ended up having ICSI, and two weeks after my two embryos were put back, I found out I was pregnant. And even better, we got 8 frozen embryos for future treatment.
About 7 weeks into the pregnancy, I started bleeding and went for an early scan, which showed we were having twins. It was the most magical moment in my life to see those 2 little heartbeats and I stared at the scan pictures constantly.
My pregnancy was one of worry as I was so scared I was going to lose my babies. I constantly worried about bleeding, I avoided any stories from people about premature labour, etc.
Apart from the initial bleeding, my pregnancy was trouble-free. I had no sickness at all. I felt great and I was always so excited and proud to tell people I was having two babies.
At 16 weeks we found out we were having 2 boys and we were so pleased.
At 23 weeks we went for a 4D scan which was fabulous – you could really see that twin 1 was a little tearaway, while twin 2 was a quiet little boy. We got a DVD of the scan which we watched over and over again.
At 24 weeks, we had a scan which showed all was ok.
At 24+5 weeks, our lives fell apart.
I went into labour and 12 hours after twin 1’s waters broke, I had my 2 gorgeous boys.
We lost twin 2 after 41 hours due to a bleed in his brain & lungs. We were told that we had to make a decision as to whether we wanted to switch off the ventilator as he would be severely disabled and would need 24-hour care. As we went back to the room, the nurse followed us and told us that twin 2 was making that decision for us and that we should go back to the room where they were.
It was the most horrendous, heart-wrenching thing to sit there holding our baby while his life was ending. We sat with him for 7 hours and cuddled and kissed him until he started to look different, then we knew it was time to say goodbye.
Our remaining son was in the special care baby unit for 18 weeks, in which time he had 4 operations and had a hard time coming off the ventilator. He has come home on oxygen, but it’s a tiny amount and he is already being weaned off it.
We are planning on having more children, but it will most likely be frozen embryo transfer, then ICSI again if that doesn’t work.
I am torn about how many embryos I would want to be put back, as fewer will mean less of a chance of getting pregnant. However, the thought of getting pregnant again with twins fills me with fear and now I have my son to consider, so it will be one embryo next time.